Christmas-ness and nursery stuff

Hello blog. I have gotten behind in updating you, which has made me dread updating you which causes me to fall even further behind. So, I have decided to give myself a break and make this a quick and painless update.

Christmas was wonderful. We went to my in-laws in the morning, received a bounty of gifts (we made out like bandits!) for which we are extremely grateful, relaxed with family over cinnamon and orange rolls, and even got in some very quality Peyton time. Next we went to my mom's where we video chatted with my brother and his family in Seattle (so cool to actually get to see them opening presents!), ate delicious ham (I want more ham), opened thoughtful gifts (thank you!), and took family pictures in front of the tree. The next day we drove out to my dad and Debbie's house for pork loin, presents, and more relaxing conversation. I am SOOOO grateful that the holidays with all of my family (in-laws included) are filled with comfort and joy. It took me many years to get over many of the insecurities and anxieties that kept me from enjoying simple moments (and to be honest that is always something I can work on), it was a difficult journey but I feel like it was worth it to be able to enjoy family gatherings so much!

Now that Christmas is over it is time to clean my house. I am pretty big these days so bending over is almost entirely out of the question. For me cleaning has mostly consisted of I kicking stuff into orderly piles for Mac to take upstairs for me. Of course Mac is currently too busy using his entire week off for nursery projects to pick up said piles but when he does find the time the piles will be waiting. Speaking of nursery projects, since the last post Mac has laid the cork flooring, raised the ceiling fan (turns out tall people were not safe in the nursery), put together the crib and changing table, installed 4 ceiling lights (thanks to the help of Mr Cossabone), sanded and stained the new baseboards, and started refinishing the dresser. Oh, and last night he picked up my stranded brother, took out his dead car battery, took him to get a new battery, and installed the new battery. So like I said, no time for picking up piles, and those piles can definitely wait. :)

Here is a slide show of how far the nursery has come!


Today the baby is SO LOW and yet SO HIGH it is making me feel very stuffed. I feel like he is in a position similar to what our dogs do in our bed in order to take up the most space; arms extended overhead and toes pointed as far as they will go. I have also had some definite kicks or punches to my cervix that have made me say "ouch!" That said I am not yet ready for this baby to be born, there is too much to do and I am definitely too tired!

Trials and tribulations

Last Wednesday night I began to suspect that I had a UTI (yuck!) and since my doctor's office was already closed I took some Azo, drank lots of water and figured I could make it until morning when my doctor's office opened. As the night wore on I began to feel worse and worse. Around 10:30 my back started hurting and I began to wonder if maybe my UTI was really a kidney infection, so we called my mother in law (the nurse) but she was asleep so we talked to my sister in law (the resident kidney infection expert) instead. She agreed that it sounded like a kidney infection and said that tylenol should help. By midnight I was in a lot of pain and decided I couldn't wait another 9 hours for my doctor's office to open so Mac took me to the hospital. I told the emergency room nurse that I was 32 wks pregnant and suspected I had a kidney infection because my back hurt. They immediately took me in a wheelchair (wheeeee) to labor and delivery. I am so impressed by my hospital! Mac and I have not yet had a chance to take a tour of labor and delivery so everything was new to us. The rooms are big and private with a futon for mac to sleep on and a full bathroom with a shower and tub, flat screen tv with DVD player and internet access. The staff was AMAZING, I am so grateful to them for walking me through the paperwork and always telling me exactly what they were going to do before doing it AND asking for my consent. They really put me at ease. Even though I was not on labor they still had me go through the process as if I was in labor so I should be pretty good at it when the real thing happens. I changed into a gown and gave them a sample and then got into bed so they could hook up the doppler for Gideon and the contraction monitor. Gideons's heart rate was lower than I am used to at our morning appointments but still in normal range and I had a couple of contractions but nothing painful. What WAS painful was my back and I began to think that I was passing a stone (I have had stones in the past so I am familiar with the feeling). Soon after the nurse brought me a couple of vicodin but they didn't take away any of the pain, in fact it got much worse. Next a very nice gentleman came and did an ultrasound of both of my kidneys and bladder. It was not fun having to lay on my back, twisting and turning so he could get the right angle but he was a really nice guy. At this point I texted all of the parent to tell them that we were in the hospital but the baby was fine. Poor Mac was such a help. I kept telling him to go to sleep but he held my hand and stroked my hair and was a great support. When the nurse came back she said that I did not have an infection and the ultrasound did not show any stones, however my right kidney was very enlarged and there was fluid backup. I was in agony and very confused because my kidney hurt but I also had sharp pain in my bladder, a burning urethra and that horrible "gotta go" feeling. Thankfully at this point (4am) they finally gave me IV pain medication which completely took the pain away and knocked me out. Early this morning Gideon's heart rate was back in the 150s when my OB came to see me. He told me that he felt I was passing a stone and he was sending a urologist to speak with me (he had a patient who was being induced in the room next door and could not stay long). Shortly afterward the urologist came in and said she agreed with my OB that I was passing stones but unfortunately could not officially confirm it because she couldn't do an X-Ray on a pregnant woman. The urologist also said that the only treatment option for a pregnant woman is to manage the pain with drugs until A) the stone passes or B) the baby is born. After another shot of Demerol we made our way home. Mac went and picked up my prescriptions and I tried to eat some lunch. At this point I began to realize how hard this was going to be. The shot began to wear off so I took a hydrocodone and went to bed. A couple of hours later I was once again in agony. Mac was at work so I sent him a message asking him to call the doctor and see if I could take my next pain pill earlier than the 6 hours listed on the bottle (I didn't think I would be able to speak to anyone coherently at this point). Thankfully they said every 4 hours would be fine. And so the cycle began. I took a hydrocodone, 45 mins later I got some relief, 4 hours after that the pain began to creep in, by the 4 hour mark I was laid out on the bed clutching the sheets, crying into a pillow, so I would take another hydrocodone and wait the 45 mins for it to kick in... This went on for 72 hours. 72 HOURS. Meanwhile the amazing husbandit (sounds like a magician no?) was taking care of me, and the dogs, and getting the house ready for our annual Christmas party. As I came out of my drug induced fog Friday night I realized the pain was gone. That is the funny thing about kidney stones, one minute they are there, the next they aren't. Our Christmas party was set for 1pm on Saturday and I was afraid of what I would find when I emerged from the bedroom at 10pm Friday because the last I had seen it, our house was a mess. Well I was totally wrong, not only had the husbandit cleaned, he had decorated. See? A magician. Of course one would thing that a kidney stone would be the worst and its passing would mark the end of a dark time. Unfortunately, no. The next morning I developed a sharp pain in my right lower back/hip/buttock region. After consulting my sister in law (massage therapist extraordinaire), cousin (mommy extraordinaire) and mother (extraordinary) I have come the the conclusion that I have a piriformis syndrome cause by pregnancy. While this is not uncommon it is incredibly annoying, painful, and limiting. I can't step backwards, turn, roll over in bed, go up or down the stairs, bend over, or generally do anything fun or productive without pain. I take the back, I can sit. Weird right? Sooo... last I checked since becoming pregnant I have had:
-costochondritis
-a sprained ankle
-kidney stones
-piriformis syndrome
all of which can only be treated by drugs that pregnant woman aren't allowed to have
...and yet I am STILL happy to be pregnant!

Roommate Christmas

Today was our annual friend Christmas party, a.k.a. Roommate Christmas. This tradition began when Mac lived with Craig and Luke and I lived with Melissa (many moons ago). We celebrated Christmas together before separating for Christmas break. Now it has grown to 15 adults and 3 children, eating, drinking, exchanging gifts, and reconnecting after a very busy holiday season. It is my favorite get-together of the year and I was terrified that my recent health problems would mean cancelling. Thank god for Mac and his amazing patience, dedication, and cleaning abilities. This year's party was a great success, with amazing food, thoughtful gifts, rambunctious children and, as Mac said in his toast, friends who have become family. I can hardly believe that next year I will have a nearly one year old baby!

Surprise!

Okay, it is official, my family is totally awesome (and sneaky)!



Today was the annual Adams Family Christmas Party, it is something I look forward to every holiday season because it is always relaxing, funny, and delicious. Yes, delicious. There is always good food, good company, and a funny white elephant gift exchange. This year my Aunt Peggy and Uncle Joe hosted the party at their home in Greenville and since that can be somewhat of a trek my siblings and I decided to car pool (ie Jeremy and Bethany hitched a ride in the Soul). We arrived a few minutes late (Bethany's fault), said our hello's and grabbed some delicious barbecue. After we finished eating my Aunt Peggy went into the back and then returned with an adorable diaper cake complete with Gideon's name on it. At this point I thought "Wow! That is so sweet!" but I had no clue that there was anything else to come. Then suddenly there were presents everywhere! Turns out this was a surprise baby shower! My family is so good at keeping secrets! My dad is normally pretty bad at it (he turns bright red and gets this goofy smile when he has a secret) so I am pretty proud of him. My Aunt Peggy and cousins recently gave me their addresses for my friend baby shower and acted like nothing was going on. My brother and sister even brought extra gifts for the shower and I didn't even notice. Seriously, I didn't have a clue. Everyone got us great stuff like adorable clothes, toys and baby essentials. Dad and Debbie even got us out car seat, which means Gideon officially has a way to get home (phew! what a relief). After I opened my presents the party continued with the white elephant exchange and lots of great conversation. I was a little relieved to have the attention off of me, I don't know how celebrities do it! Being watched made me so nervous. Not that I didn't enjoy myself, how could I not? Everyone was so kind and made Mac and me feel so loved and special. THANK YOU EVERYONE!!!!!

Busy being distracted

Well oops, I have gotten behind. If it makes you feel any better this is not the only place I have been neglecting (i.e. my messy house). Since my last post I finished my student teaching and Mac has been busy working on the nursery.

I am so glad to be done with working, I loved my classes and mentor but I was TIRED. I am not certain why nature thought it would be a good idea to keep pregnant women from getting good sleep in their 3rd trimester. Maybe someday when I am older I will get the joke but for now I am just annoyed. Unfortunately I am the worst napper ever. Sleep during the day just doesn't happen for me no matter how hard I try. There is always a combination of guilt and curiosity that keeps me awake. I desperately hope that Gideon gets his daddy's ability to fall asleep anywhere (I was once walking across campus and came upon my husband sleeping under a tree, true story). This all means that I am kind of a zombie during the day and shouldn't be allowed to operate a motor vehicle or shopping cart. To that end I have been trying to accomplish all of my Christmas shopping online. Speaking of, my friend Michelle sent out an email about her annual wrapping party and I had to decline because I have NO PRESENTS TO WRAP. I felt like such a loser, especially since I ALWAYS love the wrapping party. I immediately set out to rectify the situation (on my computer) and have made some definite headway.

Yesterday we had a doctor appointment and we finally got an ultrasound! We haven't seen our little boy since 20 weeks! Unfortunately I made the mistake of telling out tech that I am a high school science teacher. >sigh< she spent the whole time talking (complaining) about her son's science teacher and telling me how gifted he is. I am happy to talk about teaching but this was kind of supposed to be about my son. I had to interrupt her to ask how big he is and if my cervix and placenta look alright. She took a sec to answer my questions and then it was right back to blah blah blah my son is an overachiever blah blah he shouldn't have to do group work blah blah. Then she highlights the baby's face on the screen and goes into 3D! I had no idea she was going to do that, or that she even COULD do that! After an hour of listening to her talk we ended up with 4 pictures, but I love the pictures so it was all worth it. Gideon weighs around 4 pounds, 6 ounces, and is measuring 2 weeks ahead. He also has the cutest and chubbiest cheeks ever.












The nursery is looking really great. Mac has REALLY outdone himself already and his ambition is pretty much boundless. I imagine he will only be stopped by the arrival of our child. So far he has repaired water damage to the ceiling, filled in cracks in the walls (the foundation has been repaired but not all of the damage inside the house was taken care of before we moved in), took down the old ceiling fan and hung a new one, pulled up the old baseboards, scraped the popcorn off of the ceiling, re-stained the window sill, painted the window frame, and painted the room with a perfect strip of light blue at the top and dark blue at the bottom. Today he is pulling up the old carpet and then we are going to a showroom to look at cork flooring. I am very excited about cork because it is totally sustainable (made from tree bark and doesn't harm the tree), insulating (temperature and sound), soft underfoot, naturally fire, allergen and insect resistant, and it is considered an environmentally safe, low-emitting, material. Pretty sweet! We came across it while looking at bamboo flooring and after doing a little research determined it was the right flooring for us. Now we just have to choose a pattern and get it in the room. Turns out there is a 2 week lead time on flooring and since the baby is due in less that 2 months we need to get a move on. Also on the "to-do" list for the nursery is repainting the closet, hanging new closet shelves, installing new lights (purchased yesterday at Ikea!) putting in new baseboards and of course, putting together all of the furniture.

This is making me tired.

Okay time to get going on the day!

The holidays have begun!

I do not feel at all prepared for this holidays business. I imagine things will feel differently next week. Speaking of, I am SO excited to be done with work soon! My last day at the high school is Friday and I have no idea how I am going to get through the next week of school. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my class and my mentor teacher but I am so tired. That and I am down to three shirts that are long enough to cover my growing child.

Thanksgiving was nice and relaxing. First of all, it was wonderful having the whole week off. I got a lot done, including submitting my final teaching portfolio, grocery shopping, a small amount of Christmas shopping, and lots of cooking. (Maybe too much cooking, it took two days to clean my kitchen and now I am having to clean out my overstuffed refrigerator as well.) Thanksgiving morning was also our anniversary so I made a batch of half cream cheese iced, half orange glazed cinnamon rolls for our anniversary breakfast while Mac made sweet potatoes for Thanksgiving with his parents later that day. After exchanging gifts (Mac had my wedding dress cleaned and persevered!) we got dressed and headed out to Aledo for Thanksgiving lunch with Alan, DeAnna, Maggie, Peyton, John, Carol, Nikki, Kelly and Kaitlyn. It was a FULL house. Kelly and Nikki brought their new, adorable, puppies with them so between them and the babies there was a lot of giggling and cuteness going on all afternoon. Around 4:00 we headed to Corinth to have dessert with Mom, Rock and Beth. That was nice, especially when Mom, Beth and I went into the study to talk and laugh like teenagers.

One would think that being pregnant on Thanksgiving would be pretty rad; eating as much as you want with no regrets. Let me tell you, it's not. I actually have a hard time eating very much lately, it always feels like my stomach is in my throat. I am also finding that my blood sugar changes very rapidly these days which means I can go from fine to starving in about 5 minutes time. I only ate a little bit of lunch on Thanksgiving and then nothing at my mom's house, which I ended up paying for all night long with severe stomach, leg and foot cramps accompanied by the nausea of very low blood sugar and extreme heartburn. I am doing my best to stay on top of eating now and trying to eat more little snacks more often.

I don't think I am very good at nesting, I am too tired! It took me all day to dust because I kept taking breaks to rest. This may be because I am a little anemic. I have a doctor's appt tomorrow afternoon so maybe I will find out if I am still anemic. Luckily I have Mac around. He put up the Christmas lights and the tree this week AND he is upstairs painting the nursery as we speak.

Oops, it's almost 6 and I need to eat dinner. Wish me luck at my appt tomorrow!

Test results

Woowoo! Got my gestational diabetes test results back today and I am in the clear. What a relief! I am however, anemic. What are the odds of Snickers bars being involved in rectifying this situation?

GD test

Gideon has been super active the last couple of days and it is obvious that he is getting stronger. Mac felt him last night and agreed that he is getting feisty and I occasionally feel like there is a dance party going on in my body that I wasn't invited to.

Today we went to the doctor for my GD (gestational diabetes) test. I was slightly nervous about it because we also brought our Birth Preferences list with us to discuss with the doctor and while I really love my OB I have never been clear on where he stands on things like Pitocin and Episiotomies. We were also hoping to have an ultrasound today as it has been 2 months since out last one and I want another peek!

Our appt was at 9:10 this morning and before then I needed to eat something (high protein, low carb), take my glucophage, drink the Glu-cola exactly 45 mins before my appt and remember to shower. This is a lot for a somewhat absent-minded pregnant woman, so when we actually arrived on time I had to give myself a little pat on the back. I went to get my blood drawn first and discovered they wanted 5 vials. FIVE. And not the small ones either, these were large vials. Just before they finished up with the last one a nurse comes in with a GIANT shot and says "You are getting your Rhogam shot today too." Huh? No one had mentioned Rhogam to me before today. The phlebotomist finishes up, I get weighed and my blood pressure checked and they put us in the room to wait for the doctor. On the counter is the giant shot. This thing was huge! My heart was racing and I felt a little light headed from the glucose drink and blood loss which of course gave me a serious case of giggles right around the time that the doctor came in (it didn't help that Mac was reading to me from a magazine in silly accents). I mentioned to the doctor that this was the first I was hearing about my being Rh- and he seemed surprised but said something along the lines of "sometimes they don't tell people right away so they don't freak out about the shot." Not that I am challenging my Rh- status, my mom is Rh-, I just hate being told things at the last minute. I also don't like being TOLD instead of CONSULTED. Next we asked him about birthing classes and a hospital tour and he said that all of that information was in the packet we got on our first visit. Turns out we didn't get that packet. I told the doctor that I had fallen and sprained my ankle and couple weeks ago and was hoping for an ultrasound but he said we would not be getting another one for a month. Then it was time to go over the birth preferences. He quickly read the list making comments along the way that were all very positive and in the end said he felt it was all very reasonable and doable. Phew, thank goodness. I asked if he was for sure going to be the person who delivered out baby and he said that he delivers 85-90% of his patients babies and unless we were admitted at 3am on a night when he wasn't on call and delivered before he could get there than we should be fine. On the way out of the office we picked up the hospital packet we had somehow missed the first day (it was VERY helpful and answered a lot of our questions) and made an appt for two weeks from now. That's right, two weeks, cause guess what, its the THIRD trimester. For REALS.

So all in all a good appt that started out annoying but ended up positively. Afterwards the day draaaaaaaged on for what seemed like several weeks, if not months. My mentor teacher and I both are kind of burned out right now; I have to admit the weekend came at just the right time, we have been getting pretty punchy between classes. After work the rain held off long enough for me to pick up Stella from radiology and get home (Stella is afraid of the windshield wipers so I was grateful for a stress free ride home). Hopefully things will only be getting better from here (especially Monday when I get my GD test results back)

Quick update

It has been a stressful couple of weeks:
-I fell and sprained my ankle
-I was observed for the 3rd time (first time at high school)
-One of my students collapsed during class (she is okay now, thank god my very capable mentor teacher was there)
-Mac was rear ended
-The insurance company decided Mac's car was totaled and we had 4 days to find another car
-We bought a new dining table and now have to sell the old one
-Stella started her radiation treatments for her Stage 3 Mast Cell Cancer (will continue daily through Thanksgiving meaning I have to drive across town everyday after school to pick her up)
-I have grown out of many f my maternity shirts and all of my maternity jeans
-The weather has turned cold and I have all of two long-sleeved shirts and no coats or jackets
-Mac knocked my wedding ring off of my desk and it is now gone :(
...and I am sure there are other things I am blocking out due to stress overload. Being pregnant has really made all of these inconveniences even more inconvenient and frustrating. I am, however, adjusting to my never level of energy (low) and have started making myself more productive on the weekends. Today I dusted and scrubbed toilets but I am still freaking out about the amount of stuff all over our house. We have to get organized or I am going to lose my mind, for reals.

On a more positive note, Chloe has taken up residence on my belly and its pretty adorable.

Bedding Bought

Yesterday I was feeling down about some recent family drama and decided I wanted to go visit the bedding we chose for Gideon's room at Babies R' Us. Since the nursery is currently in a World War III type state of renovation, visiting a nicely decorated and accessorized place seemed like just the thing to lift my spirits. So we drove to the store and soon discovered that Babies R' Us is transitioning between new and old bedding which means the bedding we chose is no longer gracing a polished crib but instead was hanging in the back of the store under tags reading "clearance." Mac, mom, and Rock all felt that we should go ahead and buy the bedding now so as to avoid missing out on it later but I wasn't sure (because I am not sure of anything these days... sigh... preggo brain). As we were discussing it a couple of people walked up behind us. It was apparent that these people wanted my bedding, GIDEON'S bedding, and in that moment I had an instinctual reaction of "MINE!" which is lucky because we got the last 6 piece set (quilt, bumper, diaper stacker, etc) and the last cute matching lamp. Score one for Team Edwards! So now we have our bedding, extra sheets, a lamp, valence, changing pad cover and diaper stacker but we decided against buying the mobile. It was cute and stuff but I think I could make something better in the form of adorable, hand-crocheted, animals and whatnot. When we got to the house a thought struck me. My external hard drive with all of my wonderful crochet patterns is broken! Blah. This is going to be my "make it work" moment, I just know it (thank you Tim Gunn). I have decided I won't worry about it until December.

Today I should be grading tests but instead I sat down and made a website for Gideon here . I think it turned out pretty cute, I mean who can resist adorable dinosaurs?

Bedding Conundrum

So I am trying to finish our baby registry because frankly I am sick of thinking about it. All we have left to research are baby monitors, a task that has been assigned to the husbandit. And then of course we need to choose the bedding so I can select a changing pad cover, hamper, curtains, glider, etc. Not that I expect people to buy me all of these things, but I would like to get 10% off, which Babies R' Us promised to send us for all of the items not purchased on our registry. Our registries have also become a great list of baby wants and needs and has really helped me feel like I am being proactive in my preparation for Baby Mack.

Mac and I set this coming Sunday as the deadline for choosing bedding and so far I have a top 3 that I vascilate over daily.

Option 1:

Carter's Bumble Bedding

I find the colors soothing and the creatures are really unique. The blanket features a variety of soft textures and patterns. The play yard and high chair we registered for are a part of this collection.

Option 2:

Cater's Tree Tops

I love the retro colors and adorable characters. I also love how the blanket is like looking out a window at a forest scene.

Option 3:

Kid's Line Peek-a-boo Zoo

I love the bright colors, and unique skirt and valence. Also who can resist the monkey going after the 2? I ordered these cards over the weekend:

I think it would be cute to frame and hang them in a line over the crib.

What do you guys think? what catches your eye?

Registration

Mac and I finally went and registered for Baby Mack's gear this afternoon. We were SO excited for some fun baby preparation after a somewhat stressful weekend (see below) but the moment I had that little scanning gun in hand I was immediately overwhelmed. There was so much stuff. The store was full of it. It didn't help that the checklist the store gave us is ridiculous. I may not have any children of my own but I KNOW I don't need 5 different strollers. We decided to roam the aisles and only scan the items we knew we wanted while making a mental checklist of things we wanted to research once we got home. Our second stop was Target, which went quickly since our local store only has 3 aisles of stuff. Once home we hit the internet in search of product reviews and I already have several changes to make to out Babies R Us list (which I still cannot access). I also added several items to our Target list and had to create an Amazon.com list for 2 items that we really want but could not find at the other two stores. Sheesh! Who knew there was so much stuff AND I still have so many questions! How many bottles do I really need? What about breast pump type accessories like storage bottles? Are the bags worth it? Can babies use regular washcloths or are baby ones somehow special? Do I need a wipes warmer? Which diaper rash cream/nipple cream is the best? What toys should I get? Do babies even NEED toys? Should I just register for things that I will need immediately or also include things that they baby will need in a few months? Am I being greedy? This registering thing makes me sleepy.

In other news, being pregnant continues to be weird. I woke up Sunday morning with mild chest pain/soreness that increased in intensity throughout the day. By Sunday night I was getting a little worried so at the behest of a lovely lady on my mothering message board, I went to Walmart and checked my blood pressure which was normal (113/70) but I was still in unexplained pain. Luckily, I had today off for Fair Day because I woke up bright and early still hurting. I called the doctor's office when they opened (9am) but didn't hear back from them until much later in the afternoon. The doctor feels as though I have Costochondritis (inflammation of the connective tissue between the breastbone and the ribs). Normally this is treated with anti-inflammatory drugs but since I am pregnant I can't have them. Long story short, this means I can't lift anything or bend over very far or generally be of any assistance in a physical capacity until the symptoms go away. Internet research tells me that it can take a loooong time for that to happen so, >sigh<. Add that to the list of things-experienced-during-pregnancy-that-I-could-do-without.

My list of things-experienced-during-pregnancy-that-are-awesome is growing too! Baby Mack kicked me hard enough the other night that my stomach moved. Of course no one but Stella was around to see it but I am sure it will become a more frequent happening over the coming weeks.

Okay time to get ready for school tomorrow. The kids are going to watch a VHS tape. For real. VHS. Tape.

Changes

Yesterday and today have been full of excitement! At 3:03 pm on 10/01/10 (a palindrome!) Mac and I got a new niece! Even though she is 4 weeks early she is healthy and happy and 7.5 pounds! I got to hold and love on her today and I must say she is a particularly attractive baby. I am not just saying this because we are related, she is genuinely adorable and not at all alien-like. Very impressive and somewhat intimidating; Baby Mack definitely will have some competition in the adorable department. It is crazy to me how much our family has grown in such a short period of time. I remember when my siblings and I were the "kids" of the family, now I have two nieces, a nephew and a whole slew of second cousins; I could not be happier. Mac is on cloud nine, he held her yesterday at the hospital and totally took 3 turns at holding her today. He is such a proud uncle. After some initial blood pressure concerns and some soreness and pain due to a c-section Maggie seems to be doing pretty well. It is interesting to me that her blood pressure didn't lower significantly until she was finally able to see her baby and I am beyond annoyed that it took them 5 HOURS to bring the baby in. My blood pressure would have been high too.

Today was also Haydrienne's 5th birthday party and I cannot wrap my head around how much she has grown. I still remember that tiny little girl who called my Keestin and was afraid of the Sponge Bob theme song. Now she is this little adult, reading fluently, doing multiplication and getting embarrassed when her dad says he loves her in front of her friends at school. She is even playing soccer this year! To be completely honest I could not picture my life without Haydrienne in it, she has brought me so much joy and taught me so much about love and happiness. And she isn't the only baby who has suddenly blossomed into an independent child. Aidan is not only creative, tall and handsome but he is incredibly empathetic and well behaved. Oh, and a complete charmer with his adorable curls and toothy grin. Lyla is deeply entrenched in the "Terrible Twos," pushing every boundary and insisting that she be able to complete tasks on her own. She has such a fearless and independent spirit and it has been a joy watching her grow, I just wish she would slow down!

Soon (hopefully very soon) baby boy Q will be here with his own quirks, joys and , of course, changes. I am sure the time will then fly straight to the arrival of Baby Mac who will change our lives forever. When I put the dogs out this evening there was a distinct chill in the air and it hit me that this will be our last fall as "just the two of us". The largest and loudest part of me can't wait to share the holidays, school shopping and sweater weather with our son but a small voice is also mourning the passing of our very selfish and introverted life together. I wish I could slow time down for just a moment and let my husband, friends, and family know how much I have appreciated their part in the life that I am currently leading AND how grateful I am that they will influence the man that my son will be.

I suppose the weather change always makes me somewhat introspective and melancholy but such is the way of the seasons right?

Okay time for bed. It has been a long and happy couple of days and I am ready for a sleep.

Bringing Home Baby

Yesterday was my sister-in-law's baby shower and it further reinforced a sneaking suspicion I have had for some time, babies need stuff. Like clothes and beds and love. It also reminded me that I have the love covered but no stuff.

This morning the husbandit and I got up early and went to Ikea for breakfast (this is one of the Edwardseses favorite past times) and to peruse the baby things. We found several items that we would like to use in Baby Mack's room, like cloud light fixtures and leafy canopies.














While there I also found out that the bandit has never been to Babies R' Us. How can this be? So our next stop was said "R' Us" so I could show him all of the aforementioned stuff that is available for the Spud. We looked at strollers, car seats, exersaucers, swings, pack n' plays, bedding, cribs, gliders (a nice pit stop) and LOTS OF CLOTHES.

I think we may have found some crib bedding that Mac and I agree on which surprised me; I didn't think Mac liked anything available in stores and so I have spent a decent amount of time lately looking at dinosaur themed fabric on Etsy. It may have been the fact that he was able to see the bedding on the crib in person that really made the difference but Mac really liked a Carter's set (of course) that matches some Carter's swings and what not that I have had my eye on with bumblebees and snails in a nice calming green and yellow. In true husbandit form, one of his favorite parts of the bedding was how it felt. I think it is likely our son will be the same way. Turns out the set is a Babies R Us exclusive and surprisingly, reasonably priced.

On the clothes front, Mac found a onesie to bring the baby home from the hospital in. It was on sale so we bought it today and I spent a good amount of time when we got home looking at it and exclaiming "It's so small!" I actually think it looks big for being a size "newborn" but I agree with Mac that it is extra cute and worthy of putting on our baby for his first car ride. The best part is that the little footie feet have dinosaur claws on them.



When we got home I sat down to evaluate what we have and have not made decisions about and I am actually pleasantly surprised. We think we have actually found a crib we agree on at Target (Mac and I both have strong opinions about color and design so when it comes to home decor there is a lot of pre-purchase discussion and research that has to take place before any final decisions are made). The plan for next weekend is to get all of the non baby stuff (ie everything) out of the nursery (guest room) and get all of the baby stuff (furniture we stole from the neighbors garage when they moved out in the middle of the night to dodge their mortgage payment) out of the garage and into the nursery so we can evaluate what we have (and don't have). Hopefully that will give me some peace of mind and help sooth my inner nesting beast.

Now I need to go paint my toenails Colts blue in time for the Colts/Giants game tonite (or as I like to call it big Manning v. little Manning) and rearrange some seating charts for next week. The Norrises are bringing over nachos for the game tonite, Spud and I can't wait!

What's it gonna be?

Well then, I will tell you. It is a boy! woo woo! Go Team Edwards! Way to create a penis!!


We went yesterday for the 20 week anatomy scan and it confirmed that Baby E is healthy, strong and a dude. In fact the tech said it was "unmistakable" so I supposed he will always be comfortable in a locker room setting (which is good since he is going to be the next Peyton Manning and buy his mama a house). My in-laws were able to join us and it was really fun letting them find out from the source that there will be an heir to the Edwards name. More pics from yesterday's scan may be found in my preggo folder on Picasa here.

This morning, I wondered if I should maybe change the name of the blog, now that gender has been "determined," but honestly so much is left to be decided. Mac and I are not agreeing on names right now (this battle may continue into the delivery room as we are both pretty set on our name choice). We haven't picked a crib or bedding or a color for the walls (oh lord there is a LOT to do!). So I think the blog title will stay as is.

Alright it's time to get ready for my sister-in-law's baby shower. Have a good day blog land!

Soccer Player?

Normally when the baby gets to moving around a bunch A. you can't feel it from the outside and B. it stops if I put my hand in the area of movement. Tonite I felt some little flutter kicks and put my hand in the area and WHAM! Spud kicked the crud out of me. I was shocked! I went on the living room where Mac was watching the Rangers game and told him to put his hand in the same spot and nothing happened. On the way back to my desk WHAM another kick! So I ran back to Mac and made him try again. I felt a few small flutters but Mac didn't feel anything and I was about to give up when WHAM! It was pretty cool/borderline unsettling. I told Mac it's like one of your organs has decided to fight back. He thinks it may be related to watching Haydrienne's soccer game this morning. I think it probably has more to do with going to Rosa's afterwards :)

Blargh

I think the stress and exhaustion of going back to work; the pregnancy induced lack of sleep; and an overexposure to middle school children has finally culminated in a sickness. I hurt, I cough, I make phlegm, and I just want to lay in bed. So that is how I will be spending my three day weekend. I am grateful that I (fingers crossed) won't have to take any time off of work but I wish I was feeling better and could enjoy the suddenly wonderful weather. According to the list the doctor gave me I can take Actifed, Sudafed and Tylenol Cold. I told the husbandit my symptoms and he is on his way to the store to choose the one that is most appropriate to my needs (and also to Quiznos to get me a sandwich cause he is a lovely man). A part of me is definitely concerned about how this will affect Spud. Any advice?

Ladies and Gentlemen...

we have definite movement! Went on a long walk with Mac and the dogs and by the end I was feeling the strain. Got inside, made a big glass of water and got an ice pack for my abdomen cause I was feeling a little crampy. No sooner had a I sat down then Spud started kickin' it old skool. I called Mac in and put his fingers in the right spot and he felt it too! He missed it the first couple times but when he closed his eyes he felt it. How cool! I guess Spud likes ice packs (just like daddy)

Who needs a face?

Ahhh pregnancy...

So since I started taking the Clomid back February my skin has been totally and embarrassingly broken out. I see it as revenge for a virtually pimple free adolescence. My face's condition has only gotten worse as the baby has gotten bigger. Suddenly, last night after washing my make-up off my skin felt tight and burned a little. I have always had sensitive and dry skin and moisturize a couple of times a day but last night my moisturizer burned like crazy. This morning was worse, my face felt chapped and sensitive to touch; the skin was tighter and spiderweb-esque. I had to go to school without make-up on and with distinctly rosy cheeks. In the teachers' lounge I asked if anyone there had been pregnant before and if so, did their baby try various, devious, ways to remove their face from the inside? A few teachers said they had had the same problem and recommended Cetaphil, a mild, hypoallergenic moisturizer. I picked up a jar on the way home from work today and opened it up while on the phone with my sister. It was smooth and creamy and shocked the HELL out of me the moment I touched it. Since I have become a big ball of exhausted lately I put the lid back on the jar and waited for Mac to get home. He did not believe it was possible that something so white and cold had shocked me ... until it shocked him too...twice. After that the cream was fine (I'll admit, it was hard to stick my finger back in the jar at first. That first shock HURT). Now my skin feels like it's in the aftermath of a severe sunburn and will start peeling any moment. Sigh.

That said I came through the first week of student teaching feeling physically alright. The first two days I swelled up like crazy and 1st couldn't get my wedding rings off and then 2nd couldn't get them back on. Now they fit fine. The same goes for my shoes. I have actually been able to stop at the store on the way home and cook dinners (thought not both on the same day) and my headaches are receding. Don't let me fool you, these things do not necessarily make me happy. I am terrified that feeling well means that something is wrong with my baby. I know its silly but I am actually glad to have this new facial burning if it means Spud is still kickin'.

Speaking of I haven't felt the Spudster move since earlier in the week. It is still very early so I am trying not to let it concern me. I can't wait til Mac can feel it too!

Bumpity Bump

Pretty sure I felt the baby moving around during school today. I had to pee pretty bad but was waiting for class to be over so I wouldn't disturb the kiddos and there was a totally new-to-me sensation so I put my hand on my lower abdominal area and could feel it. Bumpity Bump! It was cool!

I started student teaching on Monday at the middle school and it is exhausting. Monday is the worst because I have morning duty inside super early and afternoon duty outside in the heat. This week I am observing and time is dragging by, probably because I watch the same lesson being taught 4 times a day. Can't wait til I get to be more active in the classroom.

Being pregnant and working is odd. I have to pee a lot. A LOT. I am also very sleepy. The kids have been really nice though and I think it is going to be a really good semester.

Skool Daze

Woowoo! Just talked to my grad advisor and I am cleared to leave the program in the Spring and return next Fall, that way I can graduate by May of 2012, which sounds at once both far away and very soon. This makes me feel much better about my decision to take time off to be with the baby.

Tomorrow is the Student Teaching Orientation which means I have to be on campus, car parked, signed in and in my seat at 8am. Why does campus have to be 45 minutes away? I guess it will be good practice for next week when I have to be at work by 7:15, which will no doubt also be a beating.

The jeans I bought at Oldnavy.com are way too big, who knew they would stretch out so fast? So I went and got a new pair that fit today so I will have something to wear tomorrow. I also managed to get 3 maternity tops at $6 each. Of course, I was also very tempted to buy clothes for Spud but I resisted, there will be plenty of time for that in the future. This weekend I will be going back out to look for khaki, gray, brown, black pants for work. Shopping make me sleepy (as does everything else).

Have I mentioned that Mister Edwards is the best husbandit that ever lived? Yesterday I was miserable, I seriously felt hungover all day and spent most of the afternoon laying in bed with a headache watching TV. Mac had not slept well the night before and after our doc appt had gone straight to work so I knew he was exhausted all day too. When he got home at 5:30 he came upstairs and got in bed with me and asked what I wanted for dinner. I said cake (waaaaaay too much food network watching) and you know what he did? He got up and went to the store and called me to tell me all of the varieties of cake available to see which one sounded the best. When he got home it turns out he had also bought stuff for tacos (my fav dinner) as well as kosher pickles (another fav. that I keep forgetting to buy), black olives (delicious), and almond joys. And he didn't just get regular taco fixin's, he got two kinds of beans, and sauteed mushroom and garlic in butter, and bought three kinds of salsa; he went all out! and THEN he shows me the movie he rented for us to watch, cause he is awesome. I felt so taken care of!

I have big plans for the world reveal of Spud's gender in September. Mister Edwards came up with an excellent concept that I am excited to execute so watch your mail folks!

15 week appointment

Had my 15 week OB appointment today. I am either 15 weeks tomorrow or 15+4 today, depending on if you go by ovulation date or first ultrasound. We thought Dr. Garner said they were going to do an ultrasound today so my dad took off work and drove in from Ft. Worth to see the baby this morning. (Dad actually beat us to the doc's office, so when I walked in there he was, reading the latest issue of Texas Monthly.) When we got in the back it turned out that we weren't scheduled to have an ultrasound today BUT Dr. Garner is awesome and found an excuse for us to have one. I told the ultrasound tech that we would LOVE to know the baby's sex if she was able to see anything. Its still early so I can neither confirm nor deny if she found anything... you will all have to wait until the next appointment on Sept. 13th.

Starting Saturday night I have been experiencing severe upper abdominal pains, mostly on the right side. Its hurts to breathe, sit up, light down, roll over, etc. The least painful position is flat on my back which I don't like and probably should be avoiding. The doctor had the tech check it out during the ultrasound and while there was some fluid around my right kidney everything looked alright (the pain is in the wrong spot for it to be my kidney. My experience with kidney stones has taught me exactly where my kidneys are.) I told them that I can touch exactly where it hurts and that it is actually sensitive to the touch; turns out the spot is over my gallbladder, which my dad has had removed, but the tech said it looked fine. I have also been getting headaches lately no matter how much water I drink (woke up with a hardcore headache this morning, it was like being hungover). The doctor said its because of the increase in blood volume and I should take Tylenol with my water; he even said I could have a little bit of caffeine. Problem is I don't want a little bit of caffeine, I want a LOT of caffeine in Red Bull form. Oh well, maybe I will go pick up some Barq's root beer.

The ultrasound tech took a ton of pics, this one is my favorite. Spud is waving!
The rest of the pics are here

Squish Face

Last night was pretty bad, the upstairs A/C broke so we had to sleep on a mattress on the living room floor and then the dog pooped in the bed at 2am. However, I did have the best dream ever. I dreamed that Spud was here and HE was awesome. He was wearing a black and white striped onsie and had a little adorable squish face and I got to hold him for a long time before family came to see him. The husbandit woke me up before we decided on a name, which is fine; he should probably get to have some input. It was funny because I told Mac about my dream and he said he thought we were having a boy too. Now I want to go back to sleep and dream about Spud!

I stink

Its true, I stink. Or at least I periodically stink. You see the baby has given me smelly gas of death. No lie. Mac is shocked and appalled and has threatened to sleep in the guest bedroom for the rest of the pregnancy. Hopefully this too shall pass, quickly (no pun intended). Thanks a lot, Spud, for making mommy gross.

Cherries

Food and I have become frenemies. Since getting pregnant I have found that the foods I enjoy, I REALLY enjoy, like its the best (fill in the blank) I have ever eaten. However, afterwards I usually never want to see it again, let alone eat it. Only a few foods have made the cut and are eaten regularly. The first of those is cherries. They were the first thing I craved after finding out I was pregnant (followed closely by the Taco Bell Chili Cheese burrito)and even though I was immediately ill after eating them they still seem to find their way into my shopping cart on every trip to the store. Also high on the list is soup. At first it was only cream based soups; clam chowder, chicken corn chowder, and broccoli cheese. Now its is anything with LOTS of beans and vegetables in a broth you can see through.

Unfortunately, no matter what I eat I still end up with heartburn every day after lunch and again after dinner. I told Mac yesterday that I must be eating all the wrong things because nothing seems to bring me any relief. Some helpful family members have suggested I try papaya extract and almonds, which means I will be hitting the store again tomorrow. I will be sure to eat before I go this time; today I was starving as I walked the aisles full of deliciousness and came home with two of everything and a bottle of queso. Mmmm...queso...

1st trimester scan thing

Last night Mac and I watched "The Business of Being Born" and I highly recommend it to anyone planning a birth. It was very informative and uplifting and really made us think about what we want our birth experience to be like. We have also decided that Pitocin is the devil and gateway to unnecessary interventions.

Today we went for the first trimester sequential scan that tests for genetic problems. Since neither side of the family has a history of downs syndrome or any other chromosomal issue we really weren't worried and viewed this as a great opportunity to see Spud again. My mother joined us and there was little bit of car drama combined with a little bit of parking garage drama and then elevator drama so when we arrived I was desperately grateful for the sweetheart nurses and calming atmosphere of the office. When they called us back to the ultrasound room I was immediately impressed by the 45+ plus inch tv screen they had in the room to display my little bean. I was also looking forward to having my first abdominal ultrasound; I didn't even have to shave my legs this morning! They cranked up the ultrasound machine and there was spud in all its baby glory. It moved around like crazy, waving and stretching its arms and legs, standing up and sitting down; probably because of how stressed I was leading up to the appointment. At one point it stood up tall and then slouched down into a very typical "Kristin slouching" position that nearly brought tears to my eyes; that's my baby alright! The nuchal fold measured 1.7 which we were told was perfect and then they took my blood and we were on our way. I probably could have sat there all day and watched Spud dance and play. Mac was so sweet and amazed; he took my hand and held it the whole time. The ultrasound pics hardly do Spud justice and are not nearly as good as last weeks transvaginal pics but I still like 'em, what do you think?

My baby looks like a baby!

So today I went to the bathroom (TMI?) and saw red blood! This is the 2nd time in 9 weeks so oh god! Freak out!

I went and took a shower and then called Mac who very calmly and reassuringly told me to call my doctor. Today is my doctor's day off but the nurse said to come in for an ultrasound anyway. I got to the office and had to wait for what seemed like forever as every other woman there was called before me. I am not kidding. I sat alone in the waiting room after everyone else had gone to the back. Meanwhile the husbandit, who works about 50 minutes from my doctor was trying to make it there so I wouldn't have to be alone. The poor guy got there just as I was leaving.

Today I learned two things:

1. Everything looks cool, from cervix to baby, no bleeding anywhere.
2. My baby looks like a baby.

On the last ultrasound the baby looked like a bean of some kind, now s/he has a face!

Getting my head in the game...

Mac doesn't like having a picture of an alien on the blog. I wonder which picture he is referring to...

Being pregnant, and thinking about being pregnant, and researching being pregnant, etc, has all become a huge distraction from the rest of my life. I am only taking one class this semester and THANK GOD. All of my previous semesters I have taken 3 classes, last semester I even did it without my Adderall (oh Adderall, how I MISS you)and have managed to maintain a 4.0 GPA. This semester I am still getting good grades but it is such a struggle, like I am right on the edge of disaster. Right now all I need to do is read a chapter, watch a lecture, make up a few independent study contracts and participate in the group discussion before Friday and for some reason I just can't get my head in the game. I keep daydreaming about being done with this semester, but as they say the only way to end it is to go through it right?

Oh, I got my student teaching assignment for the fall. I will spend August, September and half of October at the middle school and then the rest of October, November and December at the high school. I am so lucky that the schools are within 15 mins of my house and in a really great district. I will also be taking two classes online. Thank god I am taking the Spring semester off. I can't imagine having a baby two weeks into the semester as I had originally planned. I need to tell the student teaching office that I am pregnant, but I think I will wait until 13 weeks.

Okay enough stalling, its time to go read about gifted girls and society.

The cat is out!

We have officially told the world about our Spud. I decided that this was the best way to communicate our joy over this blessed event:

Mac and I would like to let you all know that 11 weeks ago I contracted a parasite that is currently laying waste to my body. The doctors hope that the infection will last no longer than 40 weeks but others who have suffered from similar invasions have seen them persist for 43 weeks or more. Luckily I am not contagious but my condition has caused me to avoid most social situations due to nausea, weight gain, and general physical discomfort. It is our hope that you will keep us in your thoughts and prayers in the coming weeks and keep the hope alive that this will all have a swift and happy outcome.

A recent ultrasound showed that the parasite looked like this at 7 weeks:









or perhaps more like this:













Hehehe, a little Edwardsesessses humor for you there. Luckily people seemed to like it.

Thank you everyone for all of the wonderful, positive, loving responses to our news. We are so excited to meet our baby and to introduce Spud to all of you. I know that in the coming years you will all be a part of our child's life and I wouldn't want it any other way.

Stuff and things

Great doctor visit today! We got to hear the heartbeat! The ladies on my message boards made me worry that we wouldn't be able to find it with the doppler but my doc is a pro and found it right away. The heartrate was 140 to which I said "oh, that's low" and my doctor said "No its not, normal is between 120 and 180" so now I feel better.

We are scheduled for a sequential scan on the 27th (I will be 12 weeks). My doctor said there is a possibility that they might be able to tell the gender then! After that I have another appt with my doctor on the 16th of August and they will do another ultrasound then. I can not wait to see my baby again. This is all really starting to sink in ad it feels really good. As I like to tell Mac, there's a baby in there!

My morning sickness is sticking around but it is much more manageable then it was a few weeks ago. I am back to taking my glucophage and prenatal vitamins regularly (with a new vitamin cause the last one made me want to die). Sometimes at night though I still find myself laying on the couch thinking "ugh."

I broke down and ordered maternity clothes today. Mac was a good sport and went to Old Navy with me to try things on (of course, he did ask a few times if there wasn't a girl that I would rather be there with. The answer was no, I feel fat and tired, I want to be with you.) and then today I ordered from their online sale. 1 pair of light jeans, 1 pair of dark jeans and several shirts that will finally be long enough. I feel like I can't leave my house because I am embarrassed about being stuffed in my clothes. Of course I know this is silly and no one cares what I look like but oh well.

Happy Independence Day!

Today has additional meaning for me, as I seem to have gained some independence from my morning sickness. At first I was grateful because it meant hot dogs and nachos at the rangers game. Now, of course, I am worried. I am only 9 weeks, what business do I have feeling better?

Oh well, we had a great time at the ballpark in spite of the Rangers doing their best to lose. I tried wearing my bella band today but it does not combine well with long periods of sitting. The fireworks were nice, although someday I want to sit close enough to hear the music they are choreographed to sync up with. I think I will have to add that to my list of things to do with my child, right under "go to New York to see Macy's parade" and "shop for back to school."

The cat is trying to escape from the bag...

So it turns out people just love telling other people you are pregnant, even when you told them not to. Sheesh. Of course it doesn't help that I have told a few people myself, but it was necessary! First of all, in order to manage my morning sickness I have been eating constantly, therefore I already look 4 months pregnant with twins, secondly it sucks feeling like crap and having to pretend you feel fine.

The dads were pretty excited about our news on Saturday, although my dad immediately started asking who else already knew; he is a heat seeking missile for the truth. Of course now I am finding out that both dads went home and told the extended families. Sigh.

I can't believe I have to wait until the 19th for another doctor appointment. I wonder what that will be all about. Will I get to hear the heartbeat? I hope so. I am such a anxious person, I am already worried again.

Phew, what a relief!

Guess what? I really AM pregnant! We got to see the baby's little heartbeat today, it was so cool! The heart rate was 131 which the doctor said is totally normal. I am measuring at 6 weeks 6 days, so a little behind where I thought I was according to ovulation. I am so ecstatic right now that I am practically walking on clouds.

Happy Father's Day!

Happy Father's Day everyone! The drive back from the beach only took 5 1/2 hours, thank god. I am so happy to be in my clean house with my lovely animals. The beach was fun but perhaps not my thing. In the future I think I need to plan vacations where I can go to the movies and museums and restaurants. Sitting at the beach is boring lol. It really didn't help that my morning sickness decided to kick in on the 6 hour trip down there. It was miserable and I spent the rest of the week feeling awful but trying to have fun. The beach house was seriously amazing and our friends were fun to be around but just thinking about the trip makes me nauseous.

When we got home I gave Mac his father's day presents; a little card that expressed how lucky he is to have me and a onesie that says "I love Daddy".

Next weekend we are having my dad and Mac's dad over for a home cooked lunch so we can tell them we are pregnant. The moms already know, of course.

Tomorrow is our first ultrasound, I am so nervous! What if there isn't anything there? Tomorrow morning can not come soon enough.

Testing...4...5...6...

Oookay just got off the phone with my doc and my HCG needed to be at 192 in order to be doubling every 48 hours like it is supposed to and it is at 235!!!! yay!!!!
He said I can schedule my first ultrasound for 2 weeks from now.. which is when we are at the beach so I scheduled it for the Monday after we get back (the 21st).

I knew I was nervous but I didn't know how nervous til I almost cried when he told me the results. He joked that he hoped there aren't 4 babies in there... haha!

Testing...1...2...3...

Got my test results back from the doctor.
HCG: 24
Progesterone: 40
Now I just have to wait on pins and needles to find out what the second test says. Apparently an HCG doubling time of 48 hours is what we are looking for.

Have I mentioned I LOVE my doctor? After the debacle that was my last doctor he has been such a relief. When I was looking for someone new I called my GP's office to see if they recommended anyone. The nurse who answered the phone said "oh, you need to see Dr. Garner, he is the best." That is all I have been hearing about him since, be it online reviews or the nurses in his office, everyone LOVES Dr. Garner. I don't blame them, he makes me feel completely at ease and I totally trust his judgement.

Holy Crap

Even though we have been trying for 5 months with fertility drugs I still find myself feeling surprised and terrified. I really thought this wasn't my month. I had let myself down easy and was looking forward to taking a (mandatory) break next month. 2 days ago I got a teeny, tiny, feint-as-can-be line on a test and my hopes skyrocketed but Mac and I both agreed it could easily be an evap line. Of course yesterday's test was snow white. And then today, SURPRISE! A part of me wanted to think of a cute/memorable/tear-jerker way to tell Mac about the positive test but I have zero ability to keep anything from the husbandit. I immediately sent him a link to the pictures instead. Of course as the minutes ticked by without a response I began to worry, how could he not say anything? Eventually I called him at work to see what the hold up was and it turns out he was actually working. Crazy man, doing his job during business hours! Needless to say he was thrilled!

We are both feeling very tentative about telling people about this or even accepting it as true. With my PCOS and progesterone deficiency this process has been stressful and we just don't want to get hurt. Hopefully these feelings will pass soon.